Sunday, my little family and I went to see “The Princess and the Frog”. It was AMAZING! Even that is an understatement. Aside from the kids having to use the bathroom at the climax of the movie, they enjoyed it, nevertheless! Even Imari, my son, was clapping his hands and danced to the songs. Speaking of which, the music was simply amazing!

The movie made me laugh, almost cry, and had me on edge. I LOVED it! Not to mention, Prince Naveen is gorgeous!! I mean, I was completely taken by this guy’s beauty. Tiana was a beautiful princess as well.

The movie really captured the culture of New Orleans with the well drawn setting, the singing, and .. well, EVERYTHING! This is THE BEST animated Disney movie ever created. I think I’m going to see it again!

Pit-Pat-Pit-Pat..

The rain danced on the roof and against the windows in the corridor as I walked. It wasn’t cold but my body shivered as I continued down the hall. Left-Right-Keep going-Door on your right. I remember the lady at the Information Desk telling me how to get to my destination. She hadn’t acknowledged that I even asked her for directions until I said “2269″. She looked at me and she gave me a sympathetic smile. It was at that point that I knew it was going to be difficult for me.

2269. That’s what the door read. I saw a few people standing outside. A few people were smiling and having general conversations. Two women that were outside looked at me and smiled. I reached out my hand and she grabbed it and rubbed it and smiled. I introduced myself and asked her if I was in the right place. Still smiling, she motioned for me to come in. I stood aside a lady that informed me of who everyone was in the room. I told her who I was and why I was here. She smiled. I smiled back.

Then, I turned to him. He laid there, peaceful. He was enjoying his slumber. I smiled. I remembered all the crazy times I experienced with him. I remember all of the crazy things that he said that made me laugh until I cried. I remembered him fixing my car. I remember him DEVOURING a Quarter Pounder from McDonald’s that he asked I bring for him while he took a break from Street Fighter. I was happy. We were all in a happy place.

Peanut’s hand grabbed his brother’s arm and he squeezed it. I saw the sorrow in his face. It was sorrow like no other. I lost it and I let go. The tears poured down my face and everyone turned to me and I felt so bad for not holding it together. It was harder for them and I was supposed to be strong and maintain my composure. Instead, I cried. I cried and permitted the tears to fall. I wanted to touch AJ and just wake him up. I wanted to wake him up and here him say “Ol Chief” or just to hear him make one more joke about my son’s father. I jetted out the room with tears falling because it was only at that point that I knew I couldn’t.

I ran around the corner and I leaned against the wall and I cried. I cried for at least 10 minutes. What was I thinking? I didn’t REALLY want to see him like that. I didn’t want to see him in such a feeble state when I was so used to seeing his strength. I wanted to beg the person in control to let him stay just a little bit longer. Maybe he’ll wake up..maybe he’ll come back. But who was I to request such? AJ had been in their lives longer than he was in mine. How could I have possessed such a selfish thought?

I don’t think I want to know when he finally leaves me. I don’t want to get a call from my son’s father telling me he’s no longer here. Rather, I’d prefer to remain in ignorance to what’s current. I want to remain in the state of mind that will allow me to believe that AJ is still here, fighting, and holding on for all those who love him. Mario is taking things so well. I didn’t expect that. With all of the arguing and the fighting that we have done in the past few weeks, I can’t even remember what all of it was about. I don’t even care. It’s funny how I get all teary eyed when I think about the day that it will finally sink in to Mario. God be with him. He’s going to take it hard.