I was conversing with one of my best friends and we got on the subject about the exciting things that we said we were going to do this year, but didn’t get a chance to do. From the bungee jumping, Tiki tubing down a river, to zip riding, etc., we allowed things to get in the way. We had gathered all of the information to do all of these things, but never really got the chance to do so.

I strongly believe that part of the problem was all of the planning. I tend to have a need for order, organization and a plan which then causes me to shun away from spontaneity. It’s always good to have a plan, but I’ve come to the realization that I spend entirely too much time “planning to have fun.” Fun should just happen. I’ve always argued that having a fool-proof plan will eliminate disappointments; but, I’ve failed to fathom that too much planning can lead me to those same disappointments.

As a young mother, I feel as though I’m always on borrowed time. I get to the point where I feel like there is never enough time to do anything. I sometimes feel like I should just accept the fact that there just isn’t enough time to be me and just worry about being Mom. But, I’ve realized that Me = Mom, and Mommy can still be spontaneous and fun. With that being said, I’m getting an early start on my Bucket List. I want to visit other states, other countries, take pictures, bungee jump from a building and have it filmed, float in a tube down the river, ride on a zip line, see the lights in Vegas, and emerge from the purple-blue-green waters of Pensacola like I’m auditioning for a scene for Baywatch.

I’m reverting. Not completely back to my old self but I’m letting go of some of this reservation. Even my family agrees. I’m giving up the doubt. I’m giving up the excess planning. I’m giving up on the guilt of leaving my children when I deserve some time alone. And I’m giving up on believing that chores are a form of fun and entertainment. I’m not waiting until next year. This is not my New Year’s Resolution. I’m starting NOW!

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14 Comments
  1. Kay

    December 12, 2010 at 9:25 pm

    Like I said in my new entry. It’s time we do something about it instead of stating what we want. We’re parents but we can still do spontaneous and adventurous things. We’re still young.

    I am always pressed for time. I know how you feel. Everyday I wake up I have a list of things to do. It seems never ending. I keep an organizer handy because I always seem to forget something then I get pissed off when an objective isn’t being met.

    My daughter father always try to break me out of the habit of ‘planning’ but I can’t. I like to be concise and organized. I like to think things through. I even go back and rethink to make sure my decisions are the best decisions. Sue me!

    1. Raely B.

      December 18, 2010 at 9:11 am

      I’m almost embarrassed to admit how much time it took for me to come to this exact realization. But this time, I’m removing all doubt, guilt, and reservation. I have a life of my own that needs some living, yanno?

  2. lindsie

    December 12, 2010 at 11:00 pm

    I hear ya. Everything we do to always involves the kids. I want them to be involved in everything we do but then again mommy and daddy needs some time to! I always feel guilty when we have plans for just “us” and I end up giving in and taking them along. But im determined this summer to take a week long vacation to the gulf coast of Florida with just hubby and I .. a romantic getaway. But so I don’t feel like im leaving them out or their missing something we are also going to plan a week vacation with the kids somewhere. Just don’t know where yet. Maybe for a theme/water park getaway. Something fun for the kids and even for us.

    I do believe we all deserve to have our own time too. We all need our little breaks!

    1. Raely B.

      December 18, 2010 at 9:13 am

      I am the exact same way! I always say I’m going to do something for myself, go to the movies with no one in tow, and guess who’s in tow? lol.

      The gulf coast is such a scenic place. I love Pensacola in the summer time!

  3. Shannon

    December 13, 2010 at 3:20 pm

    As a mother, I have learned that also. I have to set enough time aside for me. If I’m not satisfied and happy, how will that affect my children? Only recently have I really started asking myself that. My grandmother said, “You need to take care of you, so that your babies will have a mother who is happy and healthy.” She couldn’t have been more right. I have made more efforts to do everything that I want to do and I am definitely supporting this post! You work very hard and you should reap the benefits of doing so.

    1. Raely B.

      December 18, 2010 at 9:16 am

      That is a very good point, Shannon. And a lot of the times, I am physically and mentally drained and it’s very hard to function in a manner where my kids aren’t affected by what I’m allowing to stress me. My mom always says things like your grandmother as well. But then again, I’ve always been a tad bit hardheaded. “/

  4. Cassie

    December 15, 2010 at 2:21 pm

    Now that’s an awesome sentiment and I swear I’m sitting here cheering you on. Good luck with making the start – I hope you, and your children, enjoy it… and I thoroughly recommend seeing Vegas, it’s my favourite place in the world and I honestly beleive everyone should experience it :D

    1. Raely B.

      December 18, 2010 at 9:08 am

      Even my mom recommends going to Vegas! Everyone says I’m going to have fun and I’m ready to see what the hype is all about!

  5. Courtney

    December 15, 2010 at 6:28 pm

    Reading about all this borrowed time thing as a mom is making me nervous as I’m about to become one!!! But, I totally am excited for you to lose your reservations about stuff and just be completely spontaneous. I’ve never been like that and reading about your new plans, it makes me kinda jealous! :) good luck with everything and I’m assuming any bungee videos will be posted on your blog? ;)

    1. Raely B.

      December 18, 2010 at 9:07 am

      Trust me, I was nervous too because everybody would tell me how my life would be officially over once my child was born, but I honestly felt like like had just begun. There will be a lot of moments where you’ll be pressed for time, I think every mother can attest to that, but you get used to it and you accept it and just make the best of the situation. It won’t be easy, but it isn’t the end of the world. =)

  6. Natasha

    December 15, 2010 at 9:15 pm

    I’m all for getting out and doing adventurous things. You are still young and you only live once so live life to the fullest. Sounds like you have a pretty good bucket list so far and wowwww at bungee jumping off a building. I also want to go to Vegas to as well as back to New York for street photoraphy, Europe, Africa, and jump with the Kangaroos in Australia. To answer your question from my first post on my blog:the camera that I use is a Canon 5D.

    1. Raely B.

      December 18, 2010 at 9:04 am

      lol @ jumping with the kangaroos in Australia. Let me know how that turns out! =)

      Also, I might have to consider that Canon 5D. And again, you take wonderful photos! I wish you were down here so I could have you take our holiday family photos!

  7. Samara

    December 17, 2010 at 3:12 pm

    Yes! You sound me. I don’t wanna anything that extreme(bungee jumping) LOL! But I do wanna travel and I have made plans to do so. I really think this is great and I can’t wait to see all the pictures and read the entries about you taking part in these exciting activities!

    1. Raely B.

      December 18, 2010 at 9:02 am

      And trust me, I’ll be taking lots of pictures! =) – Good luck with your endeavors as well!

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